THE AFTERMATH

After you read this blog, you might want to nominate our household for one of those TV shows that expose and remedy families with junk and clutter problems. And I have to say that I am okay with that, because – if anything – maybe we’ll get some help detail-organizing our house and life, something that I’ve been wanting to do for the past three years.

So, in the spirit of tiredness and apathy and sass…


Exhibit A is our Christmas tree and lights that we still haven’t managed to put away from the holiday season. More importantly and embarrassing, however, is the dog hair on the floor. And, yes, this is typed in smaller font because, as noble as it may be to “keep it real”, I’d rather keep it real small. It’s kind of like whispering.



Exhibit B is our kitchen table. It started out with a few innocent school papers, followed by sale papers and mail, and then it somehow transitioned into this. That black thing is a fan. I’m not sure where it came from or how it got there, but I suspect that it arrived the same way the other things did: by someone not putting them where they belong. And to avoid shifting the blame on Jerm, I must confess that most of the stuff on the table is my fault. Notice my white coat and the USMLE book on the chair? I walked in Saturday after my test, placed my stuff on the table, and then planted myself on our couch for some mindless TV action.



Exhibit C speaks for itself. (Go ahead, take a real good look. Quite frankly, I cannot believe that people live like this either. Absolutely disgusting.) To make matters worse, the tray to the left was full of cupcakes until I got my hands on it. Nine cupcakes, seven of which I may or may not have eaten myself. In our defense, Jerm and I have recently set a goal to make an effort to recycle. Though we have containers in our garage set up for this, things often accumulate on our free kitchen surfaces out of laziness. This is something that we are working on. So, just for clarification, these unhealthy foods were not eaten in one gluttonous, face-stuffing, love-handle expanding setting.



And finally…

Exhibit D is our office, which I’ve put in here to serve as a not-so-subtle disclaimer as to why our house currently looks the way it does. This is where I’ve spent the past two months attempting to study for a board examination that I should have taken six months ago. The dogs and I camped out day and night when possible, and things piled and piled up each day. (Thanks Maisie-cakes for the shredded paper on the floor!) In Jerm's defense, I am not the cleanest person during my obsessive studying attempts. In fact, it is quite safe to say that I don't even make an effort to lift a single finger towards housework when I have an upcoming test. The world absolutely stops, which has made for an interesting and messy past couple of years if you can imagine.



I’ll admit, this mess is a disgrace to domesticity and cleanlinness and responsibility and adulthood.

And I realize that I am going to cringe tomorrow once it hits that I’ve exposed our mess and, indirectly, our character flaws to the world.

But today, I don’t care.